translation notes by Dhanika

THE QUILT

Right from the title to the last paragraph of the story, the translation is very well done. It is smartly done and, to a large extent, perfectly done. The original story carries in it a flavor of humor. The story is different and interesting but what makes it all the more interesting is the usage of pure Hindi and Urdu terms as well as proverbs. Not only this, the narration and the language hold the attention of the reader through the end. In the story, it is in fact, the language that makes all the wonders. Imagine the story, and that too on a subject like this (a lesbian relationship), being written and narrated in simple Hindi. It will surely sound a little crude and vulgar. In order to keep the humor in the language alive, the story ‘Lihaaf’ needs a very clever translation and ‘The Quilt’ is exactly what you can call one. Not only has the translation been done word-to-word (which is a very risky thing to do) but also it has been done with great care and commitment. The words and phrases used in the English piece are successful in conveying the mood and the essence of the story. Also, in the original, the narrator, that is, the small girl, in spite of her naïve abusive comments, comes across as very amiable. The English translation has been able to maintain the amiability, such that it appeals the English reader who hasn’t read the original piece.

Many sentences have been exactly translated, for example –

‘Angaaron pe letne lagi’ – ‘raked over the coals’.

Some phrases like ‘Nihayat Nek’ have been beautifully translated in ‘noblesse oblige’.

But there are some places where the actual text seems far better in its usage of language than the translation. For example –

1. ‘Vahan toh bas vah thi aur unki khujli!’ – ‘All her time was taken up with the treatment of her unfortunate itch.’

2. ‘Soti-jaagti gudiya’ – ‘Sleeping-walking doll’.

In some places, the translator has retained some words from the original – ‘Babua’ , ‘jaali karga’.

In some places, to add more effect to the translated piece, the translator has added some words, phrases and sentences of her own –

1. ‘but ungrateful wretch that he was’

2. ‘What I saw when the quilt was lifted, I wil never tell anyone, not even if they give me a lakh of rupees.’

All in all, the translation is creditable and successful in carrying the actual effect that the original carries.